Covert narcissistic abuse crushes one’s soul. This podcast is devoted to understanding covert narcissistic abuse, its effect on the victims, and how to heal.
In narcissistic families, this hierarchy is non-existent; the children are there to serve parental needs. Lack of Emotional Tune-In. Narcissistic parents lack the ability to emotionally tune in to their kids. They cannot feel and show empathy or unconditional love.
The narcissistic family hides profound pain.
Such families tend to operate according to an unspoken set of rules. Children learn to live with those rules, but never stop being confused and pained by them, for these rules block their emotional access to their parents. They basically become invisible—neither heard, seen, or nurtured. Conversely, and tragically, this set of rules allows the parents to have no boundaries with the children and to use (or abuse) them as they see fit.
The following are some common dynamics of this profoundly dysfunctional intergenerational system. (Keep in mind there are always degrees of dysfunction on a spectrum depending on the level of narcissism in the parents.)
- Secrets. The family secret is that the parents are not meeting the children’s emotional needs, or that they are abusive in some way. This is the norm in the narcissistic family. The message to the children: “Don’t tell the outside world—pretend everything is fine.”
Within families, narcissists ruthlessly set members against another. One method they use is to treat children inequitably, favoring one and targeting others. … Narcissists isolatetheir partner with threats, interrogation, belittlement, and violent outbursts.
In short, a narcissist does not see other people as human beings. They don’t consider others as having their own distinct set of needs, wants, and emotions which deserve acknowledgement or respect. To a narcissist, other people are mere objects, and their only purpose is to serve the narcissist with a steady stream of adoration known as narcissistic supply.
Because of their inability to recognize the humanity in those around them, it is not hard to understand why some of the biggest perpetrators of evil in the world have been malignant narcissists. Dehumanization of others is almost a prerequisite for large scale evil such as genocide and torture.
“Narcissists’ stress-response systems are particularly sensitive to everyday negative emotions,” Cheng explains. “Among people who are not narcissists, you don’t see this really elevated output of these stress markers.” And, interestingly, narcissists had elevated levels of both cortisol and alpha-amylase, which typically aren’t strongly correlated. Whereas cortisol reflects immediate, acute stress, alpha-amylase is more associated with long-term, chronic stress. Cheng’s research indicates that narcissists may suffer more from both.
But why? What makes narcissists so stressed? For one, narcissists might be more stressed than non-narcissists because they’re actually more insecure. Cheng says her research is consistent with the longstanding theory that narcissists are, counterintuitively, less confident and less able to cope with setbacks. What Cheng and others call narcissists’ “fragile egos” might explain why they’re more agitated by daily hassles. “If they were truly confident and not vulnerable or fragile, they should show the opposite pattern, where they would have less stress entering the body during hardship,” Cheng notes. Instead, narcissists put up a self-satisfied front that shatters every time something goes wrong.
Narcissistic victim syndrome is a term that collectively describes these specific and often severe effects of narcissistic abuse. While it’s not a recognized mental health condition, many experts acknowledge narcissistic abuse can have a serious, long lasting impact on emotional health.
Life with a narcissist can be extremely stressful, leading to depression or anxiety. It canalso make you physically sick. You may feel it in the pit of your stomach. This isn’t surprising, as stress and dismay are often coupled with a gut disturbance.
Research over the past decade has shown that there are multiple links between these microbes and your brain. Amazingly—and disconcertingly—your microbes can talk to your brain in a language it understands: neurotransmitters, the chemicals in your brain that allow one nerve cell to talk to another. Neurotransmitters like serotonin or dopamine are the traditional targets of drugs that treat depression and anxiety.
MANIPULATE A NARCISSIST (HOW TO ETHICALLY MANIPULATE THE MANIPULATOR)//Are you sick and tired of being manipulated by the narcissist in your life? Narcissists have various tactics and techniques that they use in order to emotionally manipulate their targets. Watch this video to find out how to finally turn the tables on the narcissist and ethically manipulate that manipulator!