Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Response to question – Parental Alienation

Question from anon –  They said they had read some of my postings on the website and should get rid of it because its only hurting me.

Here is my response.

“The online posts/articles/information are to help others out there who are going through the same.

There any many thousands of people going through it who don’t have any help or support. Some people are just at the beginning, but I am 25 years down the line and have learnt to live with it and if I can use this knowledge to help others and give them support I will continue to do so.

By helping others it helps me. I have always used this philosophy throughout my life and when things are going bad I try to help other people less fortunate than myself, which helps me realise things are not so bad after all.

No I am not hurting, just disappointed that I cannot see my grandson, but then if I lived on the other side of the world I would not see him, so no difference really.

They are missing out not me, my life is still the same as it has always been.

No bank of Mother to go to, no babysitting, no help with the children – I think it affects them more than me!!!

I am use to it after 25 years, it’s very new to you.

You cannot sweep it under the carpet, keep quiet and pretend it’s not happening, I have done that for many years and it does not help. Now I can come out in the open with it and share my experience and help others, it is much better for me.

Forgiveness is the key, if you can forgive all those involved the pain goes away. This does not mean I will ever forget. I do not want revenge, I am not bitter or sad, if this were the case then I would not be able to discuss it without getting emotional.

Bad things happen in everyone’s life and it happens for a reason, so we can learn!!!!!!!

I am not ashamed, I have done nothing wrong and there’s no need to keep quiet about it.”


Posted in Alienation

Forgiveness and moving forward

I have been unable or unwilling to add to this memoir blog lately, paralyzed by something, stalled and uncertain. What has it been? Fear? Restlessness? I had this feeling that I should move forward somehow, take some action, try something again. I contacted my mother’s son and commented that I had not been able to reach our mother. I had decided that her lack of email now, and lack of response to my written letter, had left me no choice but to let go. But then he responded with her phone number. Could I call her? After her silence, her continued absence from my life, her lack of any communication these last several years, could I just pick up the phone and call her? I decided to take the risk. It took me two weeks to finally make the call, but when I did she answered. We talked. We talked of the present and the past, just like that, we had an actual conversation. Through tears she told me again that she regretted not fighting back all those years ago when my father told her that she should let my sister and me go. I told her I did not blame her. Again, I gave her my complete forgiveness, my complete understanding. I reminded her that I knew she had planned to take us with her, but when my father found out he had thrown her out, forcefully. I reminded her that I knew all this.

read the full story here