Posted in Alienated children, child abuse, Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Parental Alienation Awareness

4 Facts About Parental Alienation

Wendy Archer, officer and North Texas chapter manager of Parental Alienation Awareness Organization USA (PAAO USA), a national nonprofit, shares the following insights about parental alienation.

  1. Many experts call parental alienation “the worst form of child abuse.”

  2. Alienated children and young adults often struggle with severe depression and thoughts of suicide. Sadly, many alienated children attempt suicide because of the unbearable pain and heartbreak they suffer.

  3. Children understand that they are half of each parent. To make a child hate the other parent is to make a child feel that half of him is not worthy of love.

  4. Alienating parents will often claim emphatically that a child or young adult “doesn’t want a relationship with the other parent,” but formerly alienated children have confirmed that this is not true.

read more here:-http://www.dfwchild.com/features/799/Parental-Alienation#

Posted in #child alienation, Alienated children, Alienated Children are not taught to empathize, Alienated children psychopathic parent, ALIENATED KIDS LOVE THE TARGET PARENT!, Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Stockholm Syndrome

ALIENATED CHILDREN CAN SUFFER FROM STOCKHOLM SYNDROME

STOCKHOLM SYNDROME ON THE HOME FRONT! An Explanation of the Stockholm Syndrome and its history — The Stockholm Syndrome was coined in 1973. It begin in Stockholm where bank employees were hel…

Source: ALIENATED CHILDREN CAN SUFFER FROM STOCKHOLM SYNDROME

Posted in Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Tragedy and Triumph

Alienated Child Testimony of Trena Thompson: Tragedy and Triumph

Child Parental Alienation Victim Trena Thompson tells her and her Dad’s story. Her mom alienated her from her Dad at a young age. She was molested by some of her Mom’s friends but her Mom told the Family Courts in Canada that her Dad molested her. When she was 15 she realized her Mom was using her as a weapon against her Dad so she tried to kill herself thinking that “if I was dead I could not be used as a weapon”. Trena was reunited with her Father at 17 and they developed a close relationship because when she got pregnant at 19 her Dad was the only one who was there for her.

Triumphantly today she enjoys a relationship with her two children but tragically she says her Dad died an early death from heart-problems due to what her Mom and the Canadian Family Law Courts put him through. Because of what her Mom and the Courts put her Dad through she is an activist seeking reform in Family Law. What the Family Courts did to her Dad was insane, you can hear her tell that horrible story below and why Trena says her life has been “31 years of hell”.

http://iamalienated.org/index.php/2016/06/10/iamalienated-org-alienated-child-testimony-of-trena-thompson-tragedy-and-triumph/

Posted in How Happy Brains Respond to Negative Things, Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

PMT

Poor parenting, inadequate parental supervision, discipline that is not consistent, and parental mental health status, stress or substance abuse all contribute to early-onset conduct problems; the resulting costs to society are high.[4] Negative parenting practices and negative child behavior contribute to one another in a “coercive cycle”, in which one person begins by using a negative behavior to control the other person’s behavior. That person in turn responds with a negative behavior, and the negative exchange escalates until one person’s negative behavior “wins” the battle.[8]:161 For example, if a child throws a temper tantrum to avoid doing a chore, the parent may respond by yelling that the child must do it, to which the child responds by tantruming even louder, at which point the parent may give in to the child to avoid further disruption. The child’s tantrums are thereby reinforced; by throwing a tantrum, s/he has achieved the end goal of getting out of the chore. PMT seeks to break patterns that reinforce negative behavior by instead teaching parents to reinforce positive behaviors.[1]

The content of PMT, as well as the sequencing of skills within the training, varies according to the approach being used. In most PMT, parents are taught to define and record observations of their child’s behavior, both positive and negative. This monitoring procedure provides useful information for the parents and therapist to set specific goals for treatment, and to measure the child’s progress over time.[5]:216[8]:166 Parents learn to give specific, concise instructions using eye contact while speaking in a calm manner.[8]:167

Posted in A GUIDE TO THE PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME, Are You An Alienating Parent?, Attachment and Parental Alienation, Attachment, Security, Separation and Psychological Differentiation, Parental Alienation, Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

THREE LEVELS OF PARENTAL ALIENATION

http://drbarrybrody.com/images/pas.pdf

DIFFERENTIAL DIAGNOSIS OF THE THREE LEVELS OF PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME (PAS) CHILDREN rev.4.2 (1/13/03)

Note: The diagnosis of PAS is based upon the level of symptoms in the child, not on the symptom level of the alienator

click here to download:-pas

Posted in Children of alienated parents, I am an alienated parent., Parental Alienation PA

DYSFUNCTIONAL ADULTS

SOMETIMES I WONDER WHY SUCH DYSFUNCTIONAL ADULTS CAN BE ALLOWED TO MAKE DECISIONS REGARDING CHILDREN, BUT THE secret to success FOR THOSE WHO ARE PARENTAL ABUSERS, (ALSO KNOWN AS “alienating parents”) IS THEIR APPEARANCE OF BEING ABSOLUTELY NORMAL ON THE SURFACE…. PARENTAL ALIENATORS WILL DELIBERATELY MAKE UP FALSEHOODS, DECEIVE, DELAY, AND PLAY THE VICTIM…..THESE SICK INDIVIDUALS ENJOY CONTROLLING OTHERS AND “winning,” AND CREATING AN ENVIRONMENT OF hostility ANDbitterness. ALTHOUGH OUTWARDLY THEY MAY BE SEEN AS SUCCESSFUL, CHARMING AND WINNING IN THE CAREERS, “THESE ORDINARY PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO CONSCIENCE–NO CAPACITY TO FEEL SHAME, GUILT, OR REMORSE–CAN DO ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING TO OTHER PEOPLE WITHOUT EVER FEELING GUILTY . “victim”HTTPS://MKG4583.WORDPRESS.COM/2009/07/22/SEVERE-SOCIOPATH-BEHAVIOR-LEADS-TO-PARENTAL-ALIENATION/

https://realityofalienateparentssandsteparents.wordpress.com/

Posted in 10 Parental Alienation Fallacies:, 3 Hidden Weapons of Parental Alienation, 3 keys that make parental alienation so powerfu, 4 Forms of Borderline Personality Disorder, A closer look at Parental Alienation, A GUIDE TO THE PARENTAL ALIENATION SYNDROME, Parental Alienation, Parental Alienation PA

Risks to Professionals Who Work With Troubled and Alienated Parent-Child Relationships

Working with children who have irrationally rejected a parent is an emerging area of practice with unique risks. The dynamics that drive false allegations about a parent also drive accusations against professionals who participate in a process to reunify the children with that parent. This article discusses protective measures to reduce risks of false accusations, character assassination, harassment, and violence. Recommendations are offered for organizations charged with investigating complaints. Agencies that do an inadequate job of handling such complaints may harm the public by driving innovators from the field and reducing the availability of programs that have helped many families.

Risks to Professionals Who Work With Troubled and Alienated Parent-Child Relationships

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Child Protection in Child Custody Cases

Given the frequent contentious nature of litigation surrounding child custody cases, the accuracy of abuse allegations is often questioned. There appears to be a general misconception about the prevalence of false allegations of child abuse in child custody cases. Research suggests that false allegations in child custody cases do not occur any more often than they do in non-custody cases. “Parental Alienation Syndrome” (PAS) and suggestibility are often cited as reasons to discount children’s outcries due to them allegedly being influenced or coached. Too often, child abuse allegations are not even investigated adequately because they are assumed to be a product of “PAS.”Appropriate therapy and interview protocols, ethical techniques, and a clear understanding of the dynamics of child protection in these cases is essential in order to ensure that evaluators do not dismiss a child’s outcries due to misconceptions. It is equally important to choose evaluative measures that have good sensitivity and specificity in the evaluation of abuse. A current literature concerning various ethical issues and appropriate protocols and techniques pertaining to child protection matters in child custody cases are presented.

Child Protection in Child Custody Cases

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

FORGIVEN BUT NOT FORGOTTEN

Once upon a time there was a very ordinary naive young girl of 18 who met a handsome young man 2 years older.

The young girl came from a loving family and had a very comfortable upbringing. The young man came from a very poor family, but despite their differences they fell in love.

The young man asked the young girl to marry him very soon after they had met! They young naive girl accepted the proposal and they married and had a beautiful golden haired little boy.

Even though they did not have much money they managed to buy a house and life was wonderful.

The young man had a responsible job and went to work while the young women stayed at home and doted on her beautiful baby boy.

Friends and family went to the house to see the new baby boy with gifts, but the young man sent them away and told the young women that they were not her friends and that her family did not care about her.

The young girl accepted what he said because after all he had married her, loved her and their baby boy!!!!

A year passed by and the young man wanted to move away from the area to somewhere new. The young women discovered she was to have another child. They moved to another house several miles away from their families which made life very difficult without a car.

The young women noticed that her husband did not want anyone to see her, especially as she was very large and pregnant and so he began going out socially on his own with his man friends leaving the pregnant young women alone, at home with no car, friends or family.

The young women did not mind because she knew deep down that her husband loved her because he told her all the time.

Soon a beautiful golden haired baby girl was born and the young women was very happy to have 2 beautiful golden haired healthy children.

Life went on and they moved a few more times, had wonderful holidays together with the children and did all the things normal people do.

The young man did not like the young women to have friends, so she kept herself busy home-making but felt she needed more in her life, after all she did have a good job before she met her husband.

As the children grew up she noticed that her husband would tease her little boy and call him “mummies little golden boy” and whisper things to their daughter, which made the daughter not taunt her mother.

The young man did this often and the dynamics of the relationship began to change. The young man lost his job and started acting irresponsibly and hanging out with undesirable people and other women.

They very rarely went out together and the young women thought the young man was no longer handsome when she looked at him. The love she once felt started to diminish and she wanted to be independent and go back to work.

This was forbidden and the fairy story started to turn into a nightmare.

The young women became very depressed and felt she had 3 children and no husband. After witnessing many affairs, drink and drugs, as she was only 34 she decided that would start a new life.

The man did not like this and thought his wife should stay with him no matter what. The women was no longer naive and did not want her children raised witnessing this behaviour!!! So she divorced him very quickly.

They all lived in the house even after the divorce and the nightmare became horrendous, like some horror movie until eventually the women was forced out and had to move away.

The women moved to a strange land where she knew no one,she lived alone without her children or any of her belongings. She was very lonely without her children and wrote to them every day. She tried to call them but was forbidden to speak to them. Her life was miserable and she just wanted to go to sleep and never wake up.

One day she woke up in the strange land and decided she had to start a new life, a new beginning. She went back to England and lived with her mother who gave her lots of encouragement and support.

The women was no longer weak, she had become strong and tried desperately to get contact with her children. She went to court several times, she had social workers involved, she sent letters, cards and tried to call her children but every time she was blocked.

She met another kind handsome man and they fell in love and started a new life together. Once again she was happy and life was good and maybe one day it would be complete if she could have contact with her children.

It was not to be, her children had been stolen from her and her ex husband continued to play mind games but she was stronger than ever now and managed the situation well.

Her new husband had 2 lovely children who she became very fond of and they all had wonderful family holidays together in America and Disney. Happy times once again.

She went for that job she had always wanted and progressed up the career ladder. Her confidence grew and grew.

She blossomed.

Her new kind handsome partner asked her to marry him, so off they went to Las Vegas for a fairy tale wedding and honeymoon.

She could not believe she could be so blissfully happy again, in a totally different non controlling way. She had no doubts that her new husband loved her very much, he was happy for her to have friends and loved her family too, as she did his.

One day almost 9 years later (18 years old) her daughter all grown up went to the house where they lived. They got to know each other once again, but they had to keep it a closely guarded secret because her father would be very angry if he knew.

They went shopping together, but every present that was purchased had to be hidden away from her father.

The young girl told her mother that her upbringing had been very sordid and sad and many bad things had happened to her and her brother whilst living with their father.

She had been terrified to mention her mother or the past.

She could not remember any of the nice things, holidays etc as all the family photos including the ones of themselves had been destroyed by their father.

The daughter moved to Spain and married someone who had lots of money and looked after her.

During this time the son also went to the house where his mother lived, he had been living in Australia.

She could not believe what was happening after waiting for so many years. Her son was now an adult and was almost a stranger to her.

Unfortunately he had the same tale to tell as his sister, and he too had to be very careful what he told his father.

He said sorry to his mother for what had happened and promised that it would never, ever happen again!!!!!!!!!!

He lived in the house with his mother and her new husband for over 5 weeks until he was eventually asked to leave by the new husband, after all he was in his late twenty’s and quite capable of getting a job.

The son moved out and bad mouthed the mother and her husband even though they had looked after him for over 5 weeks. His father had told a lie and said it was not possible for the son to stay with him because his parents where at his house.

The mother and her husband checked this out, just another lie!!!!

So it started again with her son after ten years.

The mother and her husband went to live in France to leave it all behind.

The daughter had a gorgeous baby boy in Spain.

The mother went to see her eventually after the baby was born.

She was under strict instructions never ever to let her father know that she had been to her house in Spain. Every gift and every photo had to be hidden away. The mother absolutely loved being a grandmother but thought it was a shame that she could not share her joyful news in case the father got to know. It was a closely guarded secret.

The daughter promised her mother that she would never ever let the same thing happen again and understood exactly what had happened once she had a baby of her own!!!!

The grandmother spent many happy years visiting her daughter and grandson in secret. Spain, Australia and then back to the UK.

They even had a wonderful holiday in Florida and Disney together when the grandson was only two.

The grandmother had her daughter and grandson in her life and was blissfully happy.

She had a wonderful husband, 2 lovely step children, her own daughter and grandson in her life – what more could she want.

The daughter, husband and grandson went to France for Christmas and met her other grandmother for the first time in many, many years.

Later on the daughter left her husband and went to France with her son for Christmas and New Year.

Her father created a huge drama back in the UK, called the Hertfordshire Police and told them some bizarre story and the phone never stopped ringing throughout Christmas and the New Year. The daughter was encouraged by her mother and husband to speak to her own husband and return to the UK with their son and sort things out. The daughter’s father told her to go to a women’s refuge when she returned to the UK.!!!!! The daughter went back to her husband.

The daughter and grandson went to France again the following summer and had a wonderful time.

She still wanted to leave her husband and started making plans.

Totally out of the blue, after the daughter’s birthday, 7 days later after returning from France the mother was blocked on all social media – Facebook, email, phone etc.

Abuse about the mother was posted all over facebook but the mother could not respond as she had been blocked. A family member had seen the abuse and was horrified that such lies should be posted on facebook!!!!

The mother could not believe what was happening in her life again!!!

She had done nothing but love her children and grandchild and wanted nothing but the very best for them.

She had forgiven the ex husband for all the grief and heartache he had caused, not only to her but also to her children over the many, many years.

FORGIVEN BUT NOT FORGOTTEN.

After much soul searching she tried once again to understand why and how all this had happened in her life.

She would not rest until she had some answers. If she could not get the answers from her own children she would look elsewhere.

In August 2014 she discovered a closed group on Facebook called “Parents Healing from Estrangement” and met many others like herself.

They all had one thing in common.

There were many questions, opinions and heartbreaking stories.

She decided to create a website and gather as much information together as she could find and post it on the website alongside her own story, so she did not have to keep repeating it over and over again.

The website grew and grew alongside the closed group on Facebook, she met many friends and read many true stories and articles. She contacted many doctors and experts and started to understand.

At last – 26 years later – she had the answer she had been looking for.

She felt a little sad, but relieved and happy that she could finish this chapter of her life and continue to be complete and happy in the knowledge that she had done everything she possibly could to retain contact with her children/grandchildren.

She now accepts her situation and is now planning ahead for 2016, new projects, new life.

She will live happily ever after with her loving husband.

The End.

 

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Massachusetts Parent Alienation Support Group — Mother Erased: a memoir

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.-Leo Buscaglia I am happy to learn of a new support group for alienated parents in […]

via Massachusetts Parent Alienation Support Group — Mother Erased: a memoir