Our courts have a duty to place the best interest of children first. Unfortunately, this is not always a duty parents take seriously with some often letting personal feelings get in the way and using their kids as pawns in their ongoing battles with their exes.
The Pretoria High Court sent a strong message today that this behaviour is unacceptable, by sentencing a mother to 30 days in jail for denying her ex-husband access to their 3-year-old. The punishment was suspended for five years, as long as the mother allowed her ex-husband access.
In 2011, the mom and her ex entered into a divorce settlement agreement, which was made a binding order of court. They agreed that the child’s dad could see his son every second weekend and during holidays, but despite attempts to exercise his right, the mother outright refused. Consequently, the mother was found to be in contempt of court for failing to comply with the order. Continue reading “Battle of the Exes”
The film follows young adults fighting to reunite with their broken families. It took years for the filmmakers to find young adults willing to go on camera to tell their stories as many did not want to talk about being brainwashed to hate a parent after a divorce, due to shame. Family courts are often overwhelmed with cases, and few protocols exist to help these families, forcing them to fight for custody instead of helping them to be co-parents. Yet there is a happy ending as these broken families are being reunited on screen, which will inspire other children to reach out to their own erased parents. It also highlights how showing the reforms to make separation of the parents healthier is urgently needed.
“Joint Custody is still not the norm, and many bar associations oppose making it the default option as there is a lot of money to be made in custody battles,” said Gentile. “Right now, only one state, Kentucky, has such a law passed in 2018.” Continue reading “Erasing Family Documentary About Child Custody After Divorce”
When caregivers conflict, systemic alliances shift and healthy parent-child roles can be corrupted. The present paper describes three forms of role corruption which can occur within the enmeshed dyad and as the common complement of alienation and estrangement. These include the child who is prematurely promoted to serve as a parent’s ally and partner, the child who is inducted into service as the parent’s caregiver, and the child whose development is inhibited by a parent who needs to be needed. These dynamics—adultification, parentification and infantilization, respectively—are each illustrated with brief case material. Family law professionals and clinicians alike are encouraged to conceptualize these dynamics as they occur within an imbalanced family system and thereby to craft interventions which intend to re-establish healthy roles. Some such interventions are reviewed and presented as one part of the constellation of services necessary for the triangulated child.
Divorce Casualties helps parents recognize the often subtle causes of alienation and teaches them how to prevent or minimize its damaging effects. Dr. Darnall gives readers practical, specific techniques for recognizing and reversing the effects of alienation including a self-report inventory to help parents assess their own alienating behavior and exercises to help them understand and modify it.