It’s crazy, my Mother and her friends abused me for fourteen years yet I still yearn for her love and defend her to my Therapist and family. I won’t hear a bad word said against her despite everything she did. It defies logic. I know it does but I cannot help it. Why?
Some of the most surprised and shocked individuals are those who have been involved in controlling and abusive relationships and then when the relationship ends, they offer comments such as “I know what he’s done to me, but I still love him”, “I don’t know why, but I want him back”, or “I know it sounds crazy, but I miss her”. I’ve once heard “This doesn’t make sense. He’s got a new girlfriend and he’s abusing her too…but I’m jealous!” Friends and relatives are even more amazed and shocked when they hear these comments or witness their loved one returning to an abusive relationship. While the situation doesn’t make sense from a social standpoint, does it make sense from a psychological viewpoint? The answer is — Yes!