You’re tired of your narcissistic parent’s intrusions into your life. She calls you at work, stalks you on the internet, and constantly intrudes in your personal life. You even suspect that she is going through your mailbox before you get home.
You are not alone. A universal characteristic of narcissists is that they have virtually no regard for personal boundaries. They violate boundaries at will with no thought of how the other person feels. A trait that leaves children of narcissists frustrated.
This practice of violating your boundaries stems from the fact that your narcissistic parent thinks you exist to meet her needs. The boundary violations often stem from an attempt by the narcissist to get her needs met.
It is common for a narcissist to treat all those close to her—whether family or friends—as the means for fulfilling her desire, needs, and wants.
To her, you are simply the vehicle for meeting her needs. She can’t conceive that her behavior is an imposition to you.
Even though boundary violation is a normal narcissistic behavior, you are not doomed to put up with it. You have the power to set firm, healthy boundaries that work for your life. And you have the right to demand your parents adhere to those boundaries.
Before discussing how to set boundaries, let’s discuss what we mean by boundaries.