A lot of people report that they feel like they are talking to a child when they talk to a narcissist. Might this be a reason why?
Narcissists tend to practice the cycle of abuse more than sociopaths or narcissists who have sociopathic traits. So they tend to come back to their targets after awhile unless they are totally engaged with a new source of supply: “I got you all wrong! What have I done?!” or anything they think of in terms of overtures.
Invalidation and persecticide has everything to do with why narcissists put their own children into toxic roles too, not just other people in their lives, including why they have a favorite child and an unfavorite marginalized child. I will be discussing why further in the post.
- a child who sees his parent cheating: “You didn’t see that.” “It isn’t what you think it is.” “How dare you accuse me of cheating!” “You are not to tell anyone else of this or you will get it from me! Do you hear what I am saying? As far as you are concerned, this never happened. Do you hear me loud and clear?”
a child lets it leak that his parents are alcoholics, and that they drink in the morning, at lunch and every night too: several martinis, a bottle of wine at dinner, and then chase it down with after-dinner drinks afterwards. He complains that his parents neglect him and his siblings because they focus their lives around drinking: “We aren’t alcoholics! A few drinks every day does not make us alcoholics!” “Who told you that! Who do you think you are, disrespecting your parents and spreading rumors!” “Why are you lying?” “I have nothing to say to you for the position you have put us in! And now CPS is knocking on our door! How dare you spread such lies!”
Besides replacing the truth with a lie (to protect their image or their family’s image), notice how controlling this all sounds too.