Emotional parasites are people who emotionally feed off another without regard to their host’s emotional well being. Emotional parasites emotionally consume their host. We all know someone who engages in parasitic behavior. You know they are emotional parasites, if after any amount of time spent with them, you feel exhausted and drained afterwards. These people overly indulge in “I” and “me” sentences. They monopolize 90% of a conversation. They seldom have time for you or your issues. Emotional reciprocity doesn’t exist in the relationship. They are overly needy and interpersonally clingy.
Not all, emotional parasites, are clinging ivies. Some are professional successes and display a facade of self-confidence. They can still engage in chronic parasitic behavior. They usually have one or two favorite hosts, but actually anyone who will listen to them and not demand anything in return will suffice.
If the griever has friends or even family members who emotionally drain them – suggest avoidance. Grievers are entitled to protect themselves. Offer the griever the one-liners below to escape from emotional parasites: Continue reading “Eliminate Emotional Parasites”
Although narcissists would never admit it, they are by nature dependent on other people for their emotional survival. If they were loners, many lives would be spared immeasurable misery. But narcissists actively, persistently pursue others to obtain their “narcissistic supply,” or sense of worth in life. The narcissist as human parasite usually takes a heavy emotional and physiological toll on her “suppliers.”
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention defines a parasite as follows:
“A parasite is an organism that lives on or in a host and gets its food from or at the expense of its host. Parasites can cause disease in humans.”
Understanding narcissism through the lens of parasitism explains their need to “feed” on others as a means of supply. The individual with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) suffers from a destabilized identity and sense of inferiority based in the formative years of childhood. He attempts to adapt by projecting a “superior” persona. But he is always seeking the validation he did not receive at crucial developmental stages as a young and relatively unformed person. His incomplete sense of being compels him to seek self-worth elsewhere, either by aligning himself with high-status people and/or by devaluing and dissociating from those who either threaten his false persona or who somehow “lower” his status.
Like most parasites, narcissists rarely kill their hosts (although malignant ones may subject them to extreme violence). But like the mind-altering variety of parasite, the narcissist works to control the “brains” of her suppliers through a wide range of manipulations, from bullying to projecting, denying to gaslighting, guilt-tripping to silent-treatment. The narcissist continuously orchestrates the “reality” around her by enlisting others in supporting her delusions of grandeur and punishing and/or rejecting them if they do not comply. To the narcissist, her spouse questioning an opinion she has declared as patented truth or her child not making the soccer team are potential humiliations to which she may react with scorn or rage. In the parasitic narcissist’s eyes, both situations weaken the desirability of her “hosts,” or sources of supply, and thereby threaten her sense of well-being.
Continue reading “The Human Leech”
- A PERSON WHO HABITUALLY RELIES ON OR EXPLOITS OTHERS AND GIVES NOTHING IN RETURN
There are many family dynamics and each family is unique. There are no perfect families and no way to make any family perfect. However, though all families will have some problems, there are some that harbor toxic, nigh-unshakable parasites — the ones with the most power in the family: the parents.
The first thing to note about all of these conditions is the parents’ inability to care about their child past their own wishes. In all of these scenarios, the parents wish to be taken care of or be paid attention to. If the parent(s), someone who should be giving unconditional love, is unable to or unwilling to give this care or love, then not only do the children suffer but the spouse may also be affected, if they are not also a parasitic parent. Let’s look at a couple of conditions that may cause this undesirable toxic relationship not only between parent and child but also between spouses. Today, I will be breaching the sacred pedestal of parenthood, and especially, the immunity of mothers.
As a side note, I want to say that I have experience with my mother in regards to having a narcissistic parent. In her case, she was a covert narcissist and although I always knew there was something not quite right about the things she was doing and saying, I didn’t have a name for it until a few years ago. I am glad that I am still young and that I was luckily out of her influence during some of my critical periods as a child (I lived with my grandparents as a young child before coming back to America to start kindergarten).