You may also have suffered quite significantly in your own life as a consequence of your parents actions and of the awful situation in which you found yourself as a child. Children brought up in high conflict relationships who have to traverse a war zone to go from one house to the other, or feel forced to abandon one parent in favour of the other do not necessarily feel all that confident about themselves, may not have a high opinion of themselves, not value themselves very much and may have difficulty in their own relationships when they become adults.
They have a higher risk of choosing the wrong partner, a partner suspiciously like at least one of their parents. They have a higher risk of reproducing in their own lives and in the lives of their own children, the very high conflict and alienation that they suffered as children.
Depression, anxiety, relationship difficulties, poor self-esteem,, poor self-confidence stalk adult children of parental alienation. Sometimes adults like yourself who have been children in alienation circumstances feels strange vacancy, like a hole inside them. Those of us who studied parental alienation or have direct experience of themselves sometimes put this down to a feeling of loss, loss of a parent who you may have always loved and who always loved you.