Monthly Archives: July 2019

My dad trained me to doubt my memory and sanity for years – and I believed him

After I learned about gaslighting, I realized I didn’t trust my memory because he’d trained me not to, through years of lies and distortions of the truth. I finally realized that I wasn’t the insane one. Gaslighting is often examined in the context of romantic relationships. This form of manipulation is damaging and hurtful in […]

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How can I let go of my trust issues with my father?

My rule of thumb: “Forgiveness is a gift. Trust is earned.” Let go of the anger and realize you still probably cannot trust things he says. Those are two separate issues which people routinely mix up and think are the same thing. Abusive people actively encourage that confusion. They want you to “forgive and forget” […]

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Dysfunctional Family Dynamics: Don’t Talk, Don’t Trust, Don’t Feel | Happily Imperfect

Dysfunctional family rules As Claudia Black said in her book It Will Never Happen to Me, alcoholic (and dysfunctional) families follow three unspoken rules: 1) Don’t talk. We don’t talk about our family problems – to each other or to outsiders. This rule is the foundation for the family’s denial of the abuse, addiction, illness, […]

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12 Clues a Relationship with a Parent Is Toxic | Psychology Today

Toxic relationships include relationships with toxic parents. Typically, they do not treat their children with respect as individuals. They won’t compromise, take responsibility for their behavior, or apologize. Often these parents have a mental disorder or a serious addiction. We all live with the consequences of poor parenting. However, if our childhood was traumatic, we […]

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The Psychology of Trust Issues and Ways to Overcome Them

WHERE DO TRUST ISSUES COME FROM? Trust can take years to develop, but it can be destroyed in an instant. People who have issues with trust have often had significant negative experiences in the past with individuals or organizations they initially deemed trustworthy. For example, studies show that children of divorced parents and those from […]

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5 Ways to Decide Who You Can Trust | Psychology Today

In a more recent study, published in the Journal of Neuroscience in August, 2014, researchers from Dartmouth and New York University showed that our brains take just three hundredths of a second, much less time than an eyeblink, to decide trustworthiness. In fact, our judgments about trustworthiness are so rapid that we are able to […]

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The Private Lie Detector Test

How many Parental Alienators would be prepared to take the test? When there is an underlying element related to a specific event which may have happened, the test can identify the truth of the matter. Suspicion erodes trust and the test will either reinstate confidence or confirm a partner’s worst fears. Either way, both partners […]

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Do you have a Pathological or Compulsive Liar in your Life?

The pathological liar There is a subtle difference between a pathological and compulsive liar, although it is possible to be both. The pathological liar will repeat a lie over and again, even when they know they’ve been found out.  Conversely, a compulsive liar will usually admit to lying and come up with an excuse for […]

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Why Do Pathological Liars Lie?

Why someone lies pathologically is often unknown, to the audience and the liar. According to Psych Central, a pathological liar appears to lie for no apparent reason or personal gain. In fact, the chronic lying seems to be a pointless habit, one which is incredibly frustrating for family, friends, and coworkers. The Psychiatric Times defines pathological […]

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