Posted in Alienated children, Alienation, NAAP, Parental Alienation PA

THE REPORT “Parental Alienation in the UK” – NAAP


“Parental Alienation in the UK”



Posted in Alienated children, Alienation, NAAP, Parental Alienation PA

NAAP education DVD – online – NAAP

NAAP Founders and Directors

Peter Davies – Director

Andrew John Teague – Co Founder


To view this DVD online you will need to sign into the NAAP website as a guest, once you have signed in you will be able to click the link and view.

Please click on the link below to watch the NAAP Educational DVD

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Posted in Alienation

Negotiating With an Abuser – Lundy Bancroft

Negotiating with an abusive man can be perilous. You may feel intimidated by him in the mediation process itself; I just recently spoke with a woman who described how her ex-partner yelled and swore at her right in front of the mediator, who neither did anything to stop him nor mentioned his conduct in her report. You may also feel pressured to agree to a plan that you aren’t comfortable with in fear that the judge will end up ordering something even worse if you don’t reach an agreement. There is no easy answer to these challenges. In a few courts, mediators are available who have been trained on domestic abuse, and some may even follow special protocols, as they should, when dealing with an alleged abuser. You should have the right not to be involved in face-to-face negotiations with a man who has abused you, but state laws and court policies don’t always respect that right.

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Posted in Alienation

Child Custody Justice – Lundy Bancroft

Children need protection from their abusive parents. In the realm of custody litigation which involves abuse, the abusive parent tends to be the father while the protective parent is usually the mother, because most perpetrators of domestic violence and of child sexual abuse are male. We don’t know that much about what happens to protective fathers, since their cases are much less common, but we know that protective mothers frequently encounter a system that is insensitive, ignorant about the dynamics of abuse, and biased against women. In this context, mothers sometimes find themselves being forbidden by the court from protecting their children from a violent, cruel, or sexually abusive father. And this outcome is a tragic one, for children and for their mothers.

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Articles – Lundy Bancroft

The mounting social and professional awareness of the negative effects on children of exposure to the behavior of batterers has drawn attention to the need for effective tools for assessing risk to children from batterers as parents or guardians (e.g. Williams, Boggess, & Carter, 2001). Such tools are particularly needed by child protective personnel, custody evaluators, and courts with jurisdiction over child custody and child welfare cases, but are also important to the work of many therapists, battered women’s service providers, batterer intervention programs, and programs for children exposed to batterers.

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Nine Things Troubled Kids Need from Their Parents

In I Still Love You, Dr. Ungar teaches parents the nine things their kids need in order to thrive. To help you put his advice into practice, we’ve created a set of cue cards that you can download, print, and carry with you or display in your home. Referring to them often will help you remember what you can do to make children change troubling behaviours and be more resilient.

Dr. Michael Ungar talks about his book I Still Love You: Nine Things Troubled Kids Need from Their Parents in this video introduction

This book for parents of children with serious emotional, psychological and behavioural challenges offers nine practical and effective strategies that parents can use to make children change troubling behaviours and become more resilient. Told as the story of three families that meet together weekly with Dr. Ungar at his office, each family’s struggles and successes are proof that with a little guidance and the power of unconditional love, any child can be helped to heal and reconnect. Continue reading “Nine Things Troubled Kids Need from Their Parents”

Posted in Alienation

Have you ever been so paralyzed by fear that you simply dissociated from it all?

Here, in brief, is how the survival-oriented acute stress response operates. Accurately or not, if you assess the immediately menacing force as something you potentially have the power to defeat, you go into fight mode. In such instances, the hormones released by your sympathetic nervous system—especially adrenaline—prime you to do battle and, hopefully, triumph over the hostile entity. Conversely, if you view the antagonistic force as too powerful to overcome, your impulse is to outrun it (and the faster the better). And this, of course, is the flight response, also linked to the instantaneous ramping up of your emergency biochemical supplies—so that, ideally, you can escape from this adversarial power (whether it be human, animal, or some calamity of nature).

So where, in what you perceive as a dire threat, is the totally disabling freezeresponse? By default, this reaction refers to a situation in which you’ve concluded (in a matter of seconds—if not milliseconds) that you can neither defeat the frighteningly dangerous opponent confronting you nor safely bolt from it. And ironically, this self-paralyzing response can in the moment be just as adaptive as either valiantly fighting the enemy or, more cautiously, fleeing from it. Continue reading “Have you ever been so paralyzed by fear that you simply dissociated from it all?”

Posted in Alienation


F3 or the Fight-Flight-Freeze response is the body’s automatic, built-in system designed to protect us from threat or danger. For example, when you hear the words, “look out!” you may be surprised to find how fast you move, and thankfully so, as you narrowly miss a flying puck sailing through your kitchen window! Or when you see a bear on the trail up ahead, you stop and remain quiet and still until it moves on. In both scenarios your system demonstrates its effectiveness at protecting you from danger. Continue reading “Fight-Flight-Freeze”

Posted in Alienation

Doing good does you good | Useful organisations and information

Direct Gov

For general guidance about how to get involved in your community.


Volunteering made easy. Quickly find ways to help in your community by searching their online database of volunteering opportunities in your area.

We are what we do

A non-profit company creating ways for millions of people to do more small things to make a big difference.


IVO is a website linking volunteers with charities and other organisations that could benefit from their time, skills and experience.

Kindness UK

Promoting, sharing and uniting kindness. Take part in the first ever nationwide kindness survey.

Action for Happiness

Action for Happiness is a movement of people committed to building a happier society. They also run the International Day of Happiness.


Volunteers are at the heart of Samaritans’ 201 branches across the UK by delivering core services, running branches, fundraising and raising awareness of what they do.

Mental Health Foundation

The UK’s leading mental health research, policy and service improvement charity. Visit their website for more tips on ways to be kind to others and how to look after your mental health.


Put your skills, energy and personal qualities to work helping people break out of poverty.

Volunteering England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland Volunteering

England Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland are committed to supporting, enabling and celebrating volunteering in all its diversity. Their work links policy, research, innovation, good practice and programme management in the involvement of volunteers.




Northern Ireland

Volunteer Development Scotland: Scotland’s centre for Excellence in volunteering, VDS leads the way in informing and modernising approaches to improve the quality of the volunteering experience for the people of Scotland.

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Action for Happiness

Helping is associated with increased happiness and health, but feelng burdened by it can be detrimental, such as in the case of long-term carers. [1] There is evidence that whilst giving for pleasure is associated with higher self-esteem, life satisfaction and positive feelings, giving under pressure is not. [27] There are times when we need to give because it is the compassionate response and the right thing to do, such as in times of crisis or need.

However as a general rule we should try to match our giving activities to things that we find inherently enjoyable, in line with our own goals and feel are worthwhile for ourselves as well as the recipient. If we are happy givers, the recipients will likely benefit more and we are more likely to continue to give. [19]

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