It has taken years to realize exactly what I need in a friendship, how I want to relate to my friends, and how I want to feel when I’m around them.
In the past, I was not as mindful or intentional about my friendships. I focused more on trying to make myself fit into the friendship rather than finding friends who were a good match for me. I spent more effort than was reasonable trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.
I sure wish I’d had more insight into myself and my friendship needs earlier in life. Maybe I would have avoided some painful experiences. Age and emotional maturity have helped me learn how to be a better friend and a better “friend picker.”