Having an Opinion vs Being Judgmental and Opinionated
I was forced to clarify my thoughts about these terms when a judgmental, highly opinionated client got into a pickle with his son. He offers his son uninvited, negative, judgmental opinions about his behavior and choices and when the son tells my client he feels judged my client says, “It’s my opinion and I have the right to express it.” Thus, when confronted he hides behind his “right to have an opinion” which conveniently allows him to avoid looking at how painful his judgments are. As a result his son avoids him because to be in his company is often too punishing. In order to discuss this issue with my client I first had to get clear on the distinction between making a judgment and having an opinion versus being judgmental and being opinionated. Unless we define our terms these kinds of discussions can be difficult since such terms often have different meanings for different folks.