Posted in Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Blaming Justifies Your Own Bad Behavior

Blame Action Loops
It is not uncommon for people who engage in blaming behavior to also engage in selfish behavior. And as long as they are getting benefit from it — whether monetary, emotional, comfort, entertainment or psychological stability — they will continue to engage in those actions. But realize that most of the time the person is too busy doing the behavior to see their actions in this context. Look at the diagram below:

What this illustrates is a simplified action loop model of how humans interact with the world around them. When functioning on this basic level, ‘stimuli’ comes in from the ‘world,’ it is evaluated and an ‘appropriate’ action is taken. An example is you come to a corner with a traffic light. The stimuli coming in is the signal is red and cross traffic is passing. The evaluation is, according to the laws, wait. That’s your action. That keeps you from getting run over. The light turns green, the cross traffic stops and you cross. We do this kind of looping process all the time, adjusting as the results of that action come in.

Notice that in the previous diagram there was a two way flow as actions and evaluation were compared with the results. In that model if something doesn’t work then the approach is to change strategy/evaluation. This will become important in the next example.

This loop takes on a different form in the blamer’s reality. This is partly because ‘evaluation’ is run through a couple of other filters. As long as everything works out for the blamer, these filters won’t necessarily reveal themselves. For example, both a blamer and a normal person choosing not to try to cross against the light will be working in basically the same model as above. However, when the action don’t work out as planned (1), the simple action loop becomes more complex.



Currently studying Psychotherapy , Cognitive psychology, Biological psychology, Counselling psychology and CBT. I believe in truth, honesty and integrity! ≧◔◡◔≦

2 thoughts on “Blaming Justifies Your Own Bad Behavior

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