Posted in Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

The Hostage Metaphor for “Parental Alienation”

1.) The Hostage Metaphor
The hostage metaphor captures the dynamics of psychological control that are
fundamental to the child’s experience, and it helps us understand why the child adopts
distorted beliefs and behaviors toward a parent. The child is essentially being held as a
psychological hostage to the psychopathology of the narcissistic/(borderline) parent.1 As a
hostage to the psychopathology of the narcissistic/(borderline) parent, the child is
subjected to powerful psychological control tactics of nullification, unpredictable
psychological torment and retaliation for displeasing the hostage-taker (the
narcissistic/(borderline) parent), and indulgent rewards for pleasing and cooperating with
the narcissistic/(borderline) parent, all of which combine to induce the child’s
psychological surrender to the attitudes, beliefs, and will of the hostage-taker.
Protecting the Child
If the child shows any bonding motivation toward the targeted parent, or even fails
to sufficiently reject the targeted parent, then the child is exposed to severe psychological
retaliation from the narcissistic/(borderline) parent. We cannot ask the child-hostage to
bond with the targeted parent until we are able to protect the child from retaliation by the
hostage-taker should the child cooperate with us to show any degree of bonding with the
targeted parent, or even for the child not to show complete rejection toward the targeted
parent. Unless we are able to protect the hostage, we cannot ask the hostage to defy the
will of hostage-taker. To do so would only expose the hostage to the retaliation of the

Source: The Hostage Metaphor for “Parental Alienation

download the document here The Hostage Metaphor



Living the dream in SW France-Retired Love Swimming, Rambling, Labrador's, Pilates, Photography, Astronomy, Reiki, Travelling. Currently studying Psychology, and member of NAAP. I believe in truth, honesty, karma and integrity! KEEPING IT REAL - No one likes someone who lies and lives a different life on social media than they do in real life. ≧◔◡◔≦

One thought on “The Hostage Metaphor for “Parental Alienation”

Leave a Reply, All comments will be moderated - Many thanks for your contribution

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.