Posted in Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Starting over after alienation

  1. Accept Change Sometimes starting over means accepting that you’re no longer the person you used to be. You’re no longer attracted by the same things or persons, you’re no longer driven by the same goals. It’s ok. Don’t blame yourself for it and don’t try to resist. Start over. As hard as it may seem in the beginning. You’ll be surprised how fast things will fall into places again.

2 Just Leave Quit the boring job, the abusive relationship, the past. Embrace the unknown. Make the first step. Every trip starts with just one step. You’re resisting to this impulse because leaving is associated with letting someone else down. Well, you won’t let nobody down if you’ll step out of an abusive relationship. But if you won’t leave, you will let down somebody very important: you..

  1. Accept To Meet Someone New Too often we’re unconsciously rejecting other people by habit. Well, make a fracture in that habit. Don’t put a label on every person you meet, assuming you know beforehand who they are, what they do and how they can interact with you. Open up, let yourself flow and look for the signs. Many times my life was truly changed when I just accepted to meet someone new.

  2. Accept Defeat And move on. Yes it hurts. Yes, you lost something, or somebody. Yes, your hopes are broken down and maybe so is the heart. Accept it. Close the battle and move on. There is this very simple thing which many people are just blindly ignoring: you can’t have a new victory until you close your current battle (by accepting defeat, if that’s what just happened).

  3. Talk to somebody It doesn’t have to be a friend. Anybody willing to listen will do it. Just take it out of our chest. Transform your experiences in words and let them out, transfer your story to somebody else. Not only you’ll feel a little better, but you may also find a new idea, a surprising solution or just the courage you lack to start fresh. Let the others be the triggers of your change.

  4. Do Something Reasonably Risky Bungee jumping, for instance, if you’re the physical type. Or, if you’re the shy guy, do a public speech in front of one thousand people. The more consuming the challenge you’re embracing, the faster you’ll get out of your comfort zone. And by getting out that comfort zone, you literally stretch your limits up to the point you’re forced to break up with the past.

  5. Go To A Live Event A concert or other stuff involving hundreds or thousands of people. Be in a crowd. In something way bigger than yourself. Blend in and lose your sense of identity (which is false anyway, we’re all part of something bigger). Confronting your own tiny ego with this huge surrounding energy will make any decision you embrace much easier. Especially a new start.

  6. Write A Story About Your Past Don’t make it a novel and don’t aim at publishing it. Just write down in your own words what happened to you. Describe the sequence of steps which drove your life to its current position. Be verbose. Don’t rush. And little by little you’re going to realize that once you put it in words, your past will become more manageable and you’ll be able to break up easier.

  7. Make A Plan And stick to it.

  8. Enjoy The Victory And Move On You don’t have to start fresh only after a big defeat. Victory is just the other face of the same coin. Don’t get too addicted to it, or you’ll end up in a continuous frustration loop. Attaching yourself to an already consumed victory is as bad as not accepting defeat. Just because your prison cell is pink, that doesn’t make it less of a prison cell. Yes, you won this one. Next.

  9. Make Peace With The Past Accept ALL your past defeats and victories. Accept all your past mistakes or brilliant decisions. Accept that the moment you stepped out of a second, there’s no way to live it again, because it’s gone. The past doesn’t really exist, it’s a human invention, just like the future . Look around and accept that the only option you have is to live now. Or not at all.

  10. Write Down The Worst Case Scenario Ok, you wanna change, but you’re not yet sure. Then write down the worst case scenario. What could go wrong? Pick the worst possible case. Write it down and be very careful at the details. It will not only make you more aware about what you really are up to, but it will also reveal that it’s much more easier than you feel. Hoping for the best and preparing for worse



Living the dream in SW France-Retired Love Swimming, Rambling, Labrador's, Pilates, Photography, Astronomy, Reiki, Travelling. Currently studying Psychology, and member of NAAP. I believe in truth, honesty, karma and integrity! KEEPING IT REAL - No one likes someone who lies and lives a different life on social media than they do in real life. ≧◔◡◔≦

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