Posted in Alienation

Parental alienation, one year on. What have I learnt? 

Lee Serpa Azevado

It is now a year since I have had any contact with my three beautiful young children.

My ex continues to deny me any contact with them.  My ex continues to take advantage of a flawed system. A system that enables her to ignore and breach court orders for contact and engagement in interventions, with no legal consequence.

I do not claim to be an expert in parental alienation. My story is no worse than any other of the incalculable number of alienated out there.

The following is certainly not intended to be viewed as some kind of checklist to battle parental alienation.

I have simply reflected on the last year and compiled a list of what I have learnt during the last twelve months.

  • Normalising the sense of sadness and low mood one will invariably experience as an alienated parent is okay to do.
  • Allowing this sadness and low…

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Posted in Alienation

Emotional Trauma

Psychological trauma is a type of damage to the mind that occurs as a result of a severely distressing event. Trauma is often the result of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one’s ability to cope, or integrate the emotions involved with that experience.

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Posted in Alienation

Recovering from Trauma

Not everyone who endures a traumatic experience is scarred by it; the human psyche has a tremendous capacity for recovery and even growth. Recovering from a traumatic experience requires that the painful emotions be thoroughly processed. Trauma feelings can not be repressed or forgotten. If they are not dealt with directly, the distressing feelings and troubling events replay over and over in the course of a lifetime, creating a condition known as post-traumatic stress disorder.

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Posted in Alienation

Let Go of Rejection

  1. Rejection actually activates the same pathways in your brain as physical pain, which is one reason why it hurts so much. The feeling of rejection toys with your innate need to belong, and is so distressing that it interferes with your ability to think, recall memories and make decisions. The sooner you let go of painful rejections, the better off your mental health will be.

Continue reading “Let Go of Rejection”

Posted in Alienation, Recovery

5 Tips for Healing Emotional Pain

  1. Let Go of Rejection. Rejection actually activates the same pathways in your brain as physical pain, which is one reason why it hurts so much. …
  2. Avoid Ruminating. …
  3. Turn Failure Into Something Positive. …
  4. Make Sure Guilt Remains a Useful Emotion. …
  5. Use Self-Affirmations if You Have Low Self-Esteem.


Posted in Alienation, Recovery

Help You get your Life Back

Life has a way of taking over. It seems to run on auto-pilot especially when we are overwhelmed, in over our heads, or simply worn out from all that life is throwing our way. After a while of trying to keep all the balls in the air, we stop paying attention and simply start reacting. Amidst all the chaos, we know something has to change, but we don’t know what or how.

Experiment and slowly edit out the digital distractions:

  • Turn off all phone notifications. All of them.
  • Understand how distracting your devices really are. Use Checky, the app that tells you how many times a day you check your phone or Moment to find out how much time you and your family spend online and set daily limits.
  • Unplug during certain hours of the day, and for 24 hours a week.
  • Challenge yourself with no email before exercise or screen-free evenings.

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Continue reading “Help You get your Life Back”

Posted in Alienation, Recovery

Take Your Life Back When You’re Broken

There’s an old, outdated assumption that time heals all wounds. But I believe this to be untrue. In the words of Dr. Phil, “Time doesn’t change us. It’s what we do with that time that changes us.” We are all more than capable of taking control back into our own hands when life knocks us down.

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