Posted in Parental Alienation & Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Helping or Enabling

Real love for somebody is being able to step back and allow them to suffer enough to recognize their need to change. That’s the only way to help make them a whole human being again.

Here are some tips to help you stop being an enabler:

    • Don’t lie for anyone. Don’t be the wife who gets on the phone and says her husband is sick when he’s hungover.
    • Don’t make excuses for others when they don’t fulfill their obligations.
    • Don’t clean up after a substance abuser. They should see the damage they’ve done and the chaos they’ve caused.
    • Be accountable for your bills only. If you’re not responsible for it, don’t pay it.
    • Stand up for yourself. You don’t have to be mean, but you do have to put your foot down.
    • Don’t rescue. A person must suffer the consequences of their actions. Which means don’t pay for lawyers or post bail.
    • Stop trying to fix everybody. You’re not a magician and you’re not God. Work on yourself. Get the support of friends, family members and counselors. Join Al-Anon or some other 12-step program. Do whatever it takes to stop yourself from hurting somebody else with your notion of helping.

 

https://www.drlaura.com/b/The-Difference-Between-Helping-and-Enabling/-344250241221129226.html

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Author:

Living the dream in SW France Love Swimming, Rambling, Labrador's, Pilates, Photography, Astronomy, Reiki, Travelling and of course my wonderful family. I believe in truth, honesty, karma and integrity! KEEPING IT REAL - No one likes someone who lies and lives a different life on social media than they do in real life. ≧◔◡◔≦

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