Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Parental Psychological Control of Children

Dr. Craig Childress: Attachment Based "Parental Alienation" (AB-PA)

In his book, Intrusive Parenting: How Psychological Control Affects Children and Adolescents, published by the American Psychological Association, Brian Barber and his colleague, Elizabeth Harmon, define the psychological control of children by a parent:

“Psychological control refers to parental behaviors that are intrusive and manipulative of children’s thoughts, feelings, and attachment to parents.” (Barber & Harmon, 2002, p. 15).

In table 1 on pages 29-32, Barber and Harmon list and describe 40 empirically validated scientific studies demonstrating the psychological control of children by parents. Forty studies in the scientific literature.

Parental psychological control of the child represents a violation of the psychological integrity of the child.

“The essential impact of psychological control of the child is to violate the self-system of the child.” (Barber & Harmon, 2002, p. 24).

Barber and Harmon cite the established research regarding the damage that this violation of the child’s psychological integrity has on…

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Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Parental Psychological Control of Children — Dr Craig Childress: Attachment-Based “Parental Alienation”

In his book, Intrusive Parenting: How Psychological Control Affects Children and Adolescents, published by the American Psychological Association, Brian Barber and his colleague, Elizabeth Harmon, define the psychological control of children by a parent: “Psychological control refers to parental behaviors that are intrusive and manipulative of children’s thoughts, feelings, and attachment to parents.” (Barber & […]

via Parental Psychological Control of Children — Dr Craig Childress: Attachment-Based “Parental Alienation”

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

The Evidence Standard To Fight Corrupted Family Courts

Civil Rights in Family Law Florida

Preponderance of Evidence Standardcustody players 2015

Under some circumstances use of the low preponderance of evidence standard may be a violation of constitutional rights. For example, if a state seeks to deprive natural parents of custody of their children, requiring only proof by a preponderance of evidence is a violation of the parents’ DUE PROCESS rights (Santosky v. Kramer, 455 U.S. 745, 102 S. Ct. 1388, 71 L. Ed. 2d 599 [1982]).Due Process Right TFRM - 2016

Freedom in matters of family life is a fundamental liberty interest, and the government cannot take it away with only a modest evidentiary standard.

However, a court may use a preponderance of evidence standard when a mother seeks to establish that a certain man is the father of her child (Rivera v. Minnich, 483 U.S. 574, 107 S. Ct. 3001, 97 L. Ed. 2d 473 [1987]).

Most states use the preponderance of evidence standard in these cases because they have…

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Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Grandparents’ Association

The Grandparents Association is a registered charity working for children since 1987 and dealing with issues such as, grandparents rights, denied contact with a grandchild, kinship care – friends and family care, residence orders, special guardianship orders, parental responsibility, family feud, no contact with a grandchild, legal contact with a grandchild, welfare benefits for grandparents bring up a grandchild, grandparents and adoption, , support groups for grandparents, childcare, grandparent and toddl

Source: Grandparents’ Association

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Volunteers wanted in and around Leeds for grandparents’ information and support line – phone 0113 244 6111 | General

The Grandparents Association is a registered charity working for children since 1987 and dealing with issues such as, grandparents rights, denied contact with a grandchild, kinship care – friends and family care, residence orders, special guardianship orders, parental responsibility, family feud, no contact with a grandchild, legal contact with a grandchild, welfare benefits for grandparents bring up a grandchild, grandparents and adoption, , support groups for grandparents, childcare, grandparent and toddler groups

Source: Volunteers wanted in and around Leeds for grandparents’ information and support line – phone 0113 244 6111 | General

Posted in An alienated daughter, Parental Alienation PA

An alienated daughter

 My story is an extreme example of Parent Alienation: When I was four years old, my father discovered my mother’s affair and in a fit of rage he through her out of our home.  My mother, crushed by the force of my father’s control, did not fight for the custody of my sister and me, but rather slipped away quietly. Traumatized, but afraid to upset my volatile father, I submitted to his plan to erase my mother from my life.

Writing: I am the process of completing my memoir, which is my story of the decades long estrangement from my mother, and how we’ve come to reunite.  Excerpts of my memoir have been picked up by  Brain, Child and the Huffington Post (among other publications).

Speaking: My story took first place at a 2015 Moth Story Slam in Boston and I went on to retell it at the GrandSLAM in March of 2016.

I also speak at events that serve to bring awareness to the domestic abuse and psychological child abuse  that has been coined “parent alienation”.

My heart’s desire is to be a voice for the children, and to empower mothers (and dads) to reclaim the children who love them.

https://thefourthagreement.wordpress.com/

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

When to Walk Away

Making my way through a parental alienation forum recently, I came across a very intelligent and well thought out discussion of when a targeted parent should end their legal battles in response to the alienating tactics of the “other parent.”

I have some experience with parental alienation and thought about what the author of the post said.  In a few words, her comments can be summed up this way: the “good guys” don’t always win.

It’s unnatural and deeply wounding  for an ex, or someone else, to disrupt or destroy a once loving relationship between a parent and a child. If you have been the victim of this, your first thought may have been “it’s impossible, and what I think is happening isn’t really happening.”

The recognition of reality leads to lengthy and sometimes expensive legal battles, emotional, mental, and spiritual exhaustion, and a cycle of recrimination and anger that can go on for years.

In the meantime, your child is caught in the middle of something they are not equipped to understand. All they know is that someone has told them something, and they have to try to figure out what to believe. They have to try to figure out who to believe. They have to figure out how to understand the confusion and conflict expressed between their parents. They have to figure out how to feel safe in the midst of all of this confusion. Children are not equipped to handle and process these types of emotional complexities. If you, as an adult, are having a hard time handling this situation, imagine how overwhelmed your child must feel.

I believe there comes a time when someone has to decide to stop engaging the fight in the courts. Someone has to concede defeat. It sounds wrong and feels horrible. But it may be the only honest and effective way forward.

Acceptance is often the final stage in the grieving process. Continue reading “When to Walk Away”

Mother’s Day Comes ‘Round Again

Family Estrangement

Mother’s Day. Not exactly my favorite holiday. I spend most of the time wondering if I’ll hear from my son – will he text, call even? Most years now, I mostly receive a nod in the form of a brief text, which is fine, but a bit underwhelming.

I recently had a session with a wonderful therapist. After telling her more of my ‘story’ from the past, she helped me understand something profoundly important for my recovery: I was a better mother than I have given myself credit for. I was a kind, sensitive, supportive mother. I loved my child with my whole heart and soul.

For many, many years, I have tortured myself with guilt. When the estrangement started, I felt even more guilt. My son was forming a very different picture of his childhood under the relentless, negative spin that his wife put on it. She has her…

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Posted in Parental Alienation PA

“I Am Free”, Healing Stories About Surviving Toxic Relationships With Narcissists And Sociopaths Now Available Through Amazon — RelationshiPedia

I Am Free: Healing Stories About Toxic Relationships With Narcissists And Sociopaths Written from the heart of survivors of narcissistic abuse, this collection of stories and poems will empower readers dealing with the aftermath of a toxic relationship and serve as a wakeup call to those who are in—or think they may be in—an abusive […]

via “I Am Free”, Healing Stories About Surviving Toxic Relationships With Narcissists And Sociopaths Now Available Through Amazon — RelationshiPedia

Posted in Parental Alienation PA

Footprints xoxo — World4Justice : NOW! Lobby Forum.

Originally posted on The Story of my Twin Boys Oliver and Oscar Ferreira: The Story of my Twin Boys Oliver and Oscar Ferreira View original post

via Footprints xoxo — World4Justice : NOW! Lobby Forum.