Here are some typical comments to avoid when talking to your children about their other parent:
• Do you hear yourself saying: “Sounds like you picked that up from your Dad/Mom.”
• Do you make a negative retort about their behavior and end it with “just like your father/mother.”
• Do you frequently compare your ex with other divorced parents you know, making sure the kids get the negative judgment?
• Do you counter every positive comment your child makes about your ex with, “Yeah, but …” and finish it with a downer?
• Do you make your children feel guilty for having had fun visiting the other parent or liking something in their home?
• Do you throw around biting statements like “If Mom/Dad really loved you …”
• Do you try to frighten or intimidate your kids during a disagreement by saying “If you don’t like it here, then go live with your Mom/Dad?